Childhood Memories

It was only a matter of time before another one of my pleasant childhood memories was turned into a big screen debaucle. Next at bat? Lindsey Lohan would like to play Wonder Woman. Uh Lindsey, dahling, I've checked my schedule and I am already available and probably work much cheaper than do you. Besides, I have the experience in being Wonder Woman. I mean, I'm no Lynda Carter, but I had the UnderRoos. And I still have Wonder Woman underwear, and so what if I had to have them custom made?

When it comes to a SuperHero, mine has always been the one with the best accessories--this is probably not really a surprise to anyone... Magic bracelets were not only practical, they were stylish! Really, the same is true of the lasso... what would I give for lasso's to come back into fashion outside of Brokeback Mountaineering. And then there is the invisible jet... and these are just the accessories that have special super powers, WW is a complete fashionista.

So, Lindsey Lohan... I don't really think so. I'm not sure you are worthy. Being WW takes more than jet black hair--it takes an attitude and style you have not had the time to acquire.

A lot of dying

There have been a lot of shocking headlines of actors, singers and writers dying over the past few days--something is rather suspicious about all of this... These were people cut down in their prime... some were as young as 75!!

In all honesty, it is sad when we lose the people that make up the memories of our youth... I'm not sure I completely remember who Buck Owens was, but I know he was on Hee Haw, and I think I watched that show as a kid (sadly).

Scalia Speaks

This week, the Supreme Court will hear Hamden v. Rumsfield... a case to determine whether detainees in Guantanemo have rights under the US Consitution or international law, or whether the "special" Bush administration commissions are satisfactory. Cheif Justice Roberts has already recused himself from the case having ruled on it as an appellate judge; now it is Scalia's turn. Comments made from a March 8 speech and subsequently reported by Newsweek indicate that he has already made up his mind concerning the issue before even hearing the case.

The detainees in Guantanemo have had thier basic human rights violated enough that it is not fair to go into their last chance with one of the Justices--who is supposed to remain (at least publically) unbiased--spewing his opinion concerning the situation for the world.

The U.S. has done so much with handling Sept 11, 2001, attacks and the "War on Terror" and the Iraqi invasion completely wrong and are held in such disdain the world over, that it would be nice if we did something right at this junction. Let's uphold human rights and not commit the same violations we say we invade other countries for doing; let's follow international law on the treatment of detainees. Let's, for just one instance, not be so nationalistic about something. We are not infalliable... we are wrong.

Can't get enuff of Nena

With all my diatribe about immigration "reform" lately, I almost forgot that Nena's (remember, Nena? Yeah, I'm old) "99 luftballons" or im Englisch "99 Red Balloons" will be airing, repeatedly, for an hour on VH1 Classics--both the English and German versions.

Why would VH1 consent to torture in this manner?

Well, folks, it is all in the name of helping Katrina victims. One sick and twisted individual, with an extra $35k and a little too much Nena love.

Now, what about the Nena victims?

More Marching

More protesters marched today in Los Angeles against immigration "reform." Marching and protesting are just great, but what next?

J and I had this conversation a few weeks ago while I was in Chicago and they were having a rally in downtown over this same issue... it's sweeping across the country--mostly conservative politicians that have supported legislation criminalizing illegal immigrants. There are other "reforms" being presented concerning assistance and basic human rights... all of it is bad.

Some alternate legislation is being presented, concerning schooling and is much more moderate in action--and isn't truly being supported by those protesting, either. Unfortunately, while protesting brings and heightens awareness of a problem, there is usually a mob mentality that forms that says immediate action now, and so more long-term solutions that may not yeild immediate results are not seen as acceptable alternatives. The immediate action legislation is generally more extreme than the compromising factors are willing to consider and in the end, there is little gained, and a lot of momentum lost.

Viva la Revolution!

Un-original Idol?

So, the Vin Diesel looking, sexy voiced American Idol contestant who did a smoldering, rock version of Walk the Line this week is now accused of copying the song.

WHOA!! Hold the presses...

American Idol contestants are copying songs? How could this be? Do the judges know? Isn't this the very pretense of American Pop? So the sexy guy did a version reminiscent of Live's version of Walk the Line... the bigger picture here is that the song wasn't an original to either performer. If you are going to take someone else's work and use it as part of your own, that's cool, but don't pretend that you came up with the idea.... and I don't think that is what Live is saying. In fact, I don't think Live is saying anything at all. The AP pulled this bit of "news" from American Idol chat rooms where people were discussing this very travesty.

Yeah, folks, you read that right, the Associated Press -- a "respectiable" news agency -- is gathering and reporting on the activity and discussion of various teens, immature adults and pedophiles in American Idol themed chat rooms. Because, this is what is important--the underbelly ramblings of Idol-izers. In fact, there were more headlines this week about American Idol related "news" than there were about the labor walk out in Georgia this week.

Labor walk out?

Yes... there have been protests across the country in the last few weeks, including a labor walk out in Georgia, against bullshit immigration reform laws. Apparently, leadership in this country has forgotten that this is a country of immigration. Of course, this leadership also sees no reason to uphold the rights of the indigenous populations. In fact, I'm surprised Native American's haven't been dubbed terrorists and hauled off to sectioned off pieces of land with substandard access to care and no real indication of what the future might hold while being lied to by the government... oh, um, heh.

So, what do labor walkouts, immigration reform and the eroding rights of the indigenous have to do with American Idol? Not a lot, but it is the concept of taking a completely unoriginal thought and masking it over with some shine and lights to try and sell it as something new and what has been missing from our lives all along... if we make a big enough noise over here, maybe no one will notice the man that has wrapped himself up in a Mexican flag and thrown himself on the street in Phoenix trying to make a point about his value as a person; about his value to our society; about his rights as a person and as a member of society.

I find it a sad state of our society when there is more buzz about the current happenings on American Idol than there is about the possibility of hundred of thousands of people being "voted off" our society. It will be a miserable case of we never knew what we had until we allowed it to be taken away if we don't wake up now and pay attention.

Lest I Forget

So, yesterday, the headline that Star Jones was recovering from her breast lift surgery nearly put me over the top... then there was today's headline that Queen Latifah is preparing to be a mom in the next year: "I'm really working on it," she says. "I've got everyone galvanized, I've cleared my schedule, and it's going to happen soon...."

Ummmmmmm....

Well, the first step would be to get someone galvanized--apparently Queen has several in line, and she's cleared her schedule. Half the fun is in getting there.

Ahhh, here's to more news that makes you say... what the fuck?

Sadly, these are not nearly as bizzarre as some of the state legislatures immigration "reform" laws aimed at the Hispanic and Latino populations in the U.S. Tear down the Statute of Liberty; we no longer want the tired, the poor or the huddled masses... you hafta pay to be here now. And, if you are here illegally, you (under most of these insane bills) would have five years to get out.

Oh, yeah, and we are still not going to give Puerto Ricans a fair say in U.S. government.

It hurts. It hurts a lot.

Musical Agism

Apparently being in your mid to late 20's is considered too old to be a pop icon. The latest buzz surrounding American Idol is the number of contestants over the age of 24... a phenom that occurred with producers increasing the age limit from 24 to 28.

*GASP*

One of the articles I read today pointed that artists like Sheryl Crow (age 44) have had to fight for pop chart position for the last 5 years and Madonna (age 47) has remained consistent on the charts.... the article was also quick to note that they are the exceptions and most artists with any age (um, read here over 25) are usually on the adult contemporary chart or writing for younger artists.

Of course, the article seemed mostly aimed at women in music and their age, though, in fairness, Barry Manilow and Tony Bennett were mentioned as being able to maintain some pop chart success in their... age? Is that really fair? Can we really talk about Tony Bennett at 76 suffering from agism in pop music the same we can of Crow or Madonna? And Manilow? Not hardly--that man would never have made it if it weren't for Bette Midler and the NYC bath houses... You want a fair comparison... how about Bobby Brown reuniting for a show with New Edition--because THAT m'friends, is a fair comparison. Still, age is more of a factor for women in music than it is for men; that isn't to discount men suffering from agism, but it happens at a little later of an age.

Still, when you are washed up at the age of 28... what's left?

Returning to Humanity

I was feeling confident that I was going to make it unscathed through the flu season this year... it was not to be the case. Today got better, but not before getting worse... it was a good thing I left work when I did--I almost didn't make it home. Yesterday found me having a breakdown and crying in the restuarant nearby because they didn't have soup I liked. Today, while on the phone to my mom in the grocery store on the way home, I felt like crying again when I had a hard time locating juice... I believe I whined, rather loudly, that "Sick people need juice... why do they hide it?"

I got my soup, I got my juice, I got more sleep and I'm starting to feel like I could get back to human soon. The achiness that reached its pinnacle today at noon seems to be going away now--or at least it is all converging in my throat--but it's nice to have it in one focussed location rather than all through my body.

Time for juice... sick people need juice.

Girls Night

Last night was Girls Night... and you always take some nugget of information away with you on a Girls Night that you might eventually come to, but regardless, there are always lessons learned... and last evening was no exception.

J was in town from Chicago, so she, B and I all headed out... we started with dinner and drinks and then headed to a friend's bday party for a couple more drinks, then made our way around and eventually, back to Ann Arbor. The three of us don't get together very often, and I think the last time we did, it involved me playing hookie from work after lunch (or possibly even earlier in the day) to go to various shopping establishments in the greater Detroit area... and that was well over a year ago.

But, there are things you learn when you get together with your girls, and last night's lessons were that a proclaimation and discussion of masterbatory habits over dinner may be shocking to some. I say this because B looked completely horrified by my candidness over the issue. Others, at the surrounding tables who caught hint of the word "masterbate" seemed to turn slightly to hear the conversation. You would think I would have remembered this lesson from the summer when at a bar in Novi with the girls, the discussion of vibrators arose (no pun intended) and seemed to send Bam-bam into a state not unlike B's last night. I don't understand the big deal; people masterbate, it's normal, it's healthy, you would think when it comes up in conversation, it wouldn't be a shock to someone's system... and yes, it does come up in conversation--but the reason behind it is private. Ironic, isn't it?

Another important lesson from Girls Night--when three women go into the store, perhaps the combined purchases should not be anti-depressants, liquor, beer and diapers. It emotes certain nonverbal responses. I'm sure the lipgloss purchase evened it all out.

And the most important part of Girls Night? It doesn't matter what we do, as long as we get to do it together.

Mahalo.

my bracket-y thing-y

Under normal circumstances, I play little to no attention to the March Madness--unless it is the name of a sale that is being held at a store I like to shop at... I follow up about April to see how the women have faired and see what Tenn. did... but otherwise, I'm not a NCAA follower for sports. This year, however, work-time gambling intrigued me, and I paid for my little bracket to play and guess who would be the fairest of them all come that first week of April. So, I'm checking in on the bracket-y thingies and though I'm not positive, I think I'm guessing at about 50%... In the end, all I care is that UCLA and OSU play that final game and UCLA takes the title. I have no idea if that will make me win the thing at work, but in my mind, it is what counts.

There you have it, my predicition on the NCAA finals... UCLA and OSU with UCLA coming out on top. Now, if that happens, you can all look back on this as prophetic and I will have a book deal regarding my amazing ability to see into the future, if it doesn't, it will just be another random prediciton that didn't come true.

Being Remiss

I've been meaning to comment on the whole Bradgelina Italian wedding scare, but quite frankly, I have been busy--I barely got to make time to jibe on Issac Hayes this week... and as you know, normally, I'm right up there on it. But I think I will get this one in under the wire.

So, rumor had it that Brad and Ang were going to enter into matrimonal something or other over the weekend while in Italia. Seems the locals were disappointed when that didn't quite happen. These are clearly two people that are in complete and total love (with themselves). It is only logical that they would want to unite in matrimonial bliss--it's worked out so well for them in the past. And you know, if they cheated on their other wife they probably won't do it again. It's evoking the "Special Circumstances" relationship rule.... now, which one gets the Oscar for best performance? Perhaps I will create my own awards program... what to call it? Has "The Daggers" been taken, do you know?

Jibe on South Park

Though his publicist is denying it, no one is buying that Tommie Cruise didn't whine to get a South Park episode featuring him in a closet (with John Travolta) pulled from the air this week by threatening to not promo Mission Impossible 3. The episode makes fun of Scientology and was aired last summer for the first time... so why the sudden swing in direction? Because Cruise is a whiner with too much money and Issac Hayes quit the show citing religious intolerance and bigotry... Isn't that part of the charm of the show? Hasn't Hayes cashed in -- heavily -- on the show making fun of... EVERYTHING? He has, but he has suddenly grown some kind of conscious. Well, all I can say is that with Hayes gone, scienetology checks may be a few dollars less.

Walk the Line

Stac lent me the DVD so I could finally, after all this time, get to see the Cash biopic Walk the Line. It's not only the title of the movie, but the title of my all-time favorite Cash song--and with over 1000 songs written, there's some heavy competition there. With a line like the following, well, you just feel it in a way that some songs never touch:

I keep a close watch on this heart of mine
I keep my eyes wide open all the time
I keep the ends out for the tie that binds
Because you're mine, I walk the line

Another song Cash performed, and I listen to when I need a laugh (and a reminder things could be worse) is the Shel Silverstein penned A Boy Named Sue.

I don't really remember when I first heard Cash; I have a vague recollection of hearing a record my grandfather was playing, and since I have his albums and so many of them are Cash--I'd like to think that it was with him. It's a romantic notion, but I have so few memories of him and most revolve around his death, that I really want to believe that it was the way it happened. And they are my memoirs, dammit.

Actually, watching the movie made me think of my grandfather, not just because of the music, but watching the struggle of a man with his father and the battle with alcoholism. I wondered, at one point, what he would have thought of the movie. I kept thinking about how I have always been told that grandpa didn't like the changes in music and he hated Dylan and rock music... I just find it interesting that Cash was one of his staples and not only was an early supporter of Dylan, he recorded Dylan songs anand later became dubbed, rather dubiously, as the godfather of gansta. Ice T made some comment that Cash was to country as gansta was to the inner city; citing the line "I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die"--and through the working of the media, was transformed.

It was a terrificly done movie, and no, it wasn't true to all the events, but memoirs are not always; they are based on memories and stories. John Carter Cash said he wanted to tell a love story of his parents... and that is what was accomplished. You don't even really have to like or known Cash or his music to enjoy the story the way you did to watch The Doors.

And that is all I have to say.

Things that make you want to say...

...shut the fuck up. With 6 years of marriage to Catherine Zeta Jones, Michael Douglas feels the need to dish up his opinions on his fellow thespians relationships and failed marriages. This from the man whose first wife left him for being lack of a father to their son and his womanizing... besides, in Hollywood, six years is not considered stable, even if it is considered longevity.

Douglas should realize that his interview tirade is bad karma... there is a thing with Hollywood marriages where one or both partners come out and say how happy they are and criticize everyone else's mistakes--then the next thing you know, they are front page in the grocery store aisle.

Chicago

As promised, a recap from the weekend in Chicago.

I had a fabulous time... I got the chance to see my dear friend and I finally met my lovely little niece; and she is so much more beautiful in person than in the pictures--but she does photograph well ;) Of course, being a complete idiot, I forgot my camera... And Day one progressed on that same level as I fell while carrying Z. It was the singlemost terrifying event in my life to date. As I went flying forward holding the sleeping baby, all I could think was that Z could not get hurt. I wasn't sure how, and I'm still not sure how I managed to mid-fall twist my body to land on my back. Her momma said it was amazing... Z had not a scratch on her body and never even woke up, Aunt Nikki didn't fair as well; I sprained my ankle, bruised both knees--or at least one is bruised and the other may be, but the skin will have to regenerate before I can really tell, my elbow is a nice shade of blues and greens and the skin on my knuckles is starting to heal. And, since everyone immediately asks--I was wearing Addidas and not anything with a heel.

While Friday turned out to be a weird mixture of events; including J getting an entire bottle of foundation dumped on her at Marshall Fields... Saturday treated us better. We headed down to Michigan Ave for some shopping... Z got her first trip to Tiffany's, which she slept through--she also slept through our excursion through Neiman Marcus' shoe department where I tried on the most fabulous pair of Manolo's -- Thyme. They only had 8 pair left in the country in my size... ahh, the joys of being financially responsible. The day was followed by an evening of Tequila (AFTER the baby went to bed, of course)... which prompted a sudden need for a trip to WalGreens to buy make up.

Sunday was more low key, hanging out, going out for a walk. We tried to take Z for pictures, but were unsuccessful, though I did manage to buy her this little green and pink seersucker dress. Z picked it out herself--she smiled at it when I showed it to her and that was enough for me... maybe it's a good thing she slept through Tiffany's... LOL.

I know that at 3.5 months of age, the lessons of shopping may not be fully retained, but I know, at some point, it will occur to her when she wants something to look at her dad and explain that she needs it because "It is practical and stylish." Now, she will "instinctively" know that practical is a horrifying and bad word, but that it will need to be used on occassion--very strategically. It is hard to exude my aunt-ly influence from such a distance, but I will not be remiss in my duties going forward.

A reminder

So, I sat down intent on doing some writing to relieve the frustration I've had the past few days when what comes across the television but a commercial for Icy Hot featuring Shaq. I'm not sure that I've ever fully described my loathing for Shaq, but even if I had I don't think I may have conveyed it properly. He is arrogant, cocky and dumb--he is also a talentlessk, over-rated moose. Yes, I said it--there is no talent in being big and sweating all over the "little" people. Though, I will admit--he does do THAT well.

Just had to get that off my mind tonight.

Drive-By Dating

So, the experience with the speed dating was not horrible, but I will not do it again. No amount of $1 beer will change that. I once wrote, fictiously that engineers in Michigan were the equivalent of investment bankers in NYC; and tonight, every other guy I met was an engineer... don't get me wrong, I have a huge respect for engineering and the people that engineer--but all I'm saying is that in a room full of your peers, it isn't getting you anywhere and you better have something better to offer.

Top things I learned tonight:
--While most men were homeowners (and they made sure to mention it as a part of their hobbies), they miss the apartment days. IN OTHER WORDS, I have a house, but I would do you at your apartment, too.

--Men get the same look in their eyes when you tell them you do pilates as if you said you were a gymnast or contortionist. GUESS WHAT? It doesn't work that way fellas.

--There are a lot of regular guys, working, going to the gym and saving babies all over the greater Detroit area--and it is all just part of a days work. UMMMM, no. At least one guy was honest and said he liked to hang out and watch tv.

--Sometimes, 6 minutes with someone is just too long.

--Drinking Bud Light is wrong on many levels.

--Drinking Bud Light from a can is even worse.

--Paying $1 for a Bud Light in a can is too expensive.

--Paying for 3 Bud Lights in a can is a pathetic means of getting through 2.5 hours of drive-by dating.

--Chips, Salsa and Bean Dip are not the best appetizer to serve to a group of 34 speed daters.

I took notes, there will be more to follow after some much needed sleep.

Good night and good luck

And...?

A brief update, with a larger recap to follow later... I am heading out shortly for a Drive-by Dating "Event" or, as some call it, Speed Dating... even still, other's refer to it as "pre-dating." Pre-dating implies that I may actually date someone I meet there. Of course, I realize that is the point, and I may be going in with less than a positive attitude; but right now, I'm looking at it as I'm spending $35 to haul my tired ass to Royal Oak for appetizers and a cash bar. Or, I could be pleasantly surprised... if nothing else, I hope to have new material for the next View or two.

Made it back from Chicago last night--late. I hated to leave, but cats and work required my prescence back in the greater (heh) Detroit area--and in that order, too. More on the trip later... I have to get dressed and put on some make-up... the parade of torture, in 7 minute increments awaits. LOL

Rockin in the Free World

Jonathan Demme's documentary on Neil Young, Heart of Gold, which opened last month, is finding its way to Ann Arbor this weekend. Basically, a concert film, it is said to highlight the greatness and legend-ness of Young. I'm not sure that a film can truly do that--but it is a noble and noteworthy attempt, from my understanding. I'm looking forward to seeing it; eventually.

Young does something that most musicians have often failed to do; he has learned to adapt without compromising. His work has been classified under nearly every major genre and he's not done. In the late 70s, he embraced his punk-ness with recording Hey, Hey, My, My (Into the Black) with its comparison to Elvis and Johnny Rotten. In the 90s he was dubbed the Godfather of Grunge, and was quoted by Cobain (from the same song) "It's better to burn out than to fade away."

Often a figure to publically speak out through his music about his concern for the environment, politics in the U.S. and his mistrust for the music industry, Young has changed the scope of his art on many occassions. Most often recognized for a "skirmish" with Lynryd Skynryd over the song "Southern Man" Young has said that there really never was much of an ordeal and indeed, despite the Skynryd references to Young in "Sweet Home Alabama" Ronnie Van Zandt was often seen on stage and in publicity shots wearing a Young t-shirt. Young has even performed "Sweet Home Alabama" in concert on several occassions--whatever the deal, it wasn't all that big. And that, in the current landscape of east coast vs west coast, seems an ungraspable concept. Was there ever a Canada vs the South? Not likely.

The significance of Young will likely not be fully realized in this documentary, but hopefully, the music carries some of it through.

Cubism Revisited

Stac just had to share with me the Fortune article about cubicles. The author(s) clearly was trying to instill humor in an otherwise lame and boring assignment. Well, if nothing else, the gallery of Cubes over the Years is worth a gander... and a laugh.

Censorship and politicking

Over the course of the last few days, since the South Dakota governor signed his state's crap legislation, I've read a lot of people's opinion and debate concerning the possibilities of what this legislation's impact may, or may not, be. Much of it is misguided assumption and illogical argument; laden with fallacy. Most chiming in are just spewing what they might have read or heard elsewhere, with an occassional historical Court reference, which may or may not have been relevant... Yes, Plessy vs. Ferguson has some basis and grounds for philosophical debate on the issue of abortion, but it might be more relevant if the people discussing Plessy had actually read the decision.

As usual, I'm more interested in what people outside the United States are saying about the situation. In reading some European blogs, I've seen comments to the effect that this is why people hate Americans, we are a nation of contradictions collapsing on itself and that our politicking has gotten sickening beyond description. It seems justified. No one really knows where the fall out will be; the scope can only really be guessed at. But it is an emotional issue for many, as it should be. For too long, too many people who believe in reproductive freedoms and choice have stood silently by while rights were slowly and quietly being chipped away--because it was just one small thing... well, it isn't small anymore, but has the precedence been set? It remains to be seen.

Meanwhile, one of my favorite journalists wrote last week about the political fights of his country (the Phillipines) and its affect on censorship and freedom of expression. Rome Jorge's article appears here in The Manila Times. It is worth a read.

Walk in peace, and I might add, but not in blindness.

South Dakota returns to 1973

Disappointing news out of South Dakota today; their lame ass govenor signed their lame ass legistatures bill that pretty much makes getting an abortion in the state of South Dakota illegal. I don't really know what they are calling it in South Dakota, but I have been refering to it as the return to coat hanger legislation. It will be fought, and hopefully, defeated. But it is a sad day nonetheless.

Final Oscar Say

Yeah, so the parade of lame-ass fashions and boring speeches is over... big upset as Brokeback didn't win best picture. Jon Stewart rocked--even if some critics are panning him today--everyone I talked to loved him and only watched for him. Clooney was classic, in action and Armani. Reese was as cute as always. Three 6 Mafia was the best; their performance and acceptance rocked an otherwise boorish night. What I loved, was when they announced that Three 6 Mafia won, Dolly Parton bounced and shreiked in delight--you'd have thought she won instead of lost...

So, anyway, it seems like for that amount of time, I should get an Oscar myself. Clearly, in my sweats and oversized fleece, I was the best dressed last night.

Oscar night

"Clooney is like a Chanel suit; he will never go out of style." ~ Sex and the City

George took the prize for Supporting Actor... beating out the favored Jake G. (hell if I can spell it) for Brokeback Mountain. I have to say, Clooney's accepance speech is one of the best I can remember for forever.

And, I have to say, Jon Stewart, as usual, made me laugh to tears with his dry sarcasm and wry commentary. His self-depreciating humor translates well to the Oscars. And quite honestly, he is the sole reason I decided to watch this year. Previous years have found me an awards show junkie, and after the flat fashion and disappointing predictability, I gave up this year. But Stewart's comment that Walk the Line was a remake of Ray with white people--well, that was priceless, Jamie Foxx and I were both rollin'.

I am however, glad to be watching... Dolly Parton just finished an incredible performance of her nominated song from TransAmerica, Traveling Thru. I'm also looking forward to the song nominated from Hustle & Flow to be performed.

Meanwhile, it seems I have a new email -- looks like some spam from a site called LoveHappens, and apparently, they need my help. I must go, the delete button awaits.

La Senorita Loca

I know it's rude, but spaghetti is not a toy.

I uttered this sentence today. I really, really did. I couldn't believe I heard it come out of my mouth. Allow me to set the scene....

I was making pancakes--I had a craving, it was dire. I knew the open package of spaghetti was performing its delicate balancing act atop the box of mostacholi, but as I removed the flour from the pantry, I had hope that it would remain. The tingling of noodles behind me moments later alerted me to its failure to remain balanced (there is a larger lesson in there, isn't there?).

After concluding the addition of the flour to my mix, I discovered that only a small portion of the open spaghetti package had spilled. But, if you have ever had a spaghetti noodle spill, you know it is a lot like a game of pick up sticks... only the sticks are finer and much more brittle. The interesting challenge in this scenario, and which brings me back to the utterance of stupid things, is that by the time I got back to the spill to clean it up, my ever astute jungle kitties had discovered the incident and were launching a full investigation. Calvin had sauntered by to view the scene and decided that it warranted no further action on his part. Vinnie was hiding in his "spot" in the closet and was completely unaware of any goings-ons... but Jake and Bowie felt that this should not only be delved into further, but that in order to do so properly, they should sit in the very middle of the mess for a much more comprehensive and fuller understanding of what had happened, how it was going to affect them and what they would need to do going forward.

It would seem that my cleaning up the noodles only proved to hamper their investigative efforts. Bowie, being an older, and at this moment, seemingly wiser cat, removed himself from the middle of the mess and watched from the safety of the carpet. Jake, however, saw no reason to leave. The very fact that I was trying to collect all the brittle noodles into a piles going in the same direction proved to be a very fascinating turn of events for the youngest of my jungle beasts. It seemed only logical to him that he should try to *help* me in this effort. He learned very quickly that if you bite or swat at the noodles, they will break into magnificent little pieces that can then be batted at an amazing speed, never to be seen again under the refrigerator. The refrigerator is another fascinating and mysterious being in the world of a jungle kitty worthy of its own entry at another time. But, I digress, and it was at this point that I looked at Jake biting and swatting noodles that I said: I know it's rude, but spaghetti is not a toy.

It was at that moment, I realized, I had gone completely loca, and possibly not in a good way. And then I was reminded about the Flying Spaghetti Monster and wondered if perhaps Jake was just thinking he had been "touched by his noodley appendage." ... Yeah, loca... LOL

Hasta luego.

WalkAmerica

As I posted earlier, I am participating this year in the March of Dimes WalkAmerica event; which is a 6 mile walk on April 29. Several friends and I are walking because every year, half a million babies in the U.S. are born prematurely. Premature birth is the leading cause of newborn death and many life long disabilities. The funds we raise in WalkAmerica support research that saves babies' lives. The mission of the March of Dimes is to improve the health of babies by preventing birth defects, premature birth, and infant mortality.

On April 8, there will be an all-day crop at Scrapbook Memories in Chelsea, MI, to raise money for this walk. Please view the Evite for more information on attending. We hope to see you there!!

If you cannot make it, please do remember to buy a ticket, or six, for a chance to win a fabulous tote filled with goodies (valued at $100), which will also benefit WalkAmerica. The drawing will be held at the store on April 28.

Terrifying Travolta

There is not much more terrifying than John Travolta getting ready to play the mother in another big screen rendition of Hairspray. Sorry Ricki Lake, you won't get another shot in this film, which is also set to feature Queen Latifah.

I like musicals, but this makes me want to vomit just a little. The only good thing from this is that it may delay the movie version of Dallas... yeah, in the trend to capitalize on the big tv shows of the 80s via movies, Travolta was being courted to play JR Ewing.

*Sigh* It is almost as sad as the number of hits I get to this blog looking for the Kid Rock/Scott Strapp sex video.

Get over it.

Would anyone outside of regular and occassional Playboy readers really ever have known that Jessica Alba was featured on the cover of this month's issue if not for her drawing attention to it by demanding it be pulled from the stands. Smooth move, Alba...

Apparently, she is upset that the image was acquired from Sony by the mag and "leads" people to think she is nekkid on the inside. She's concerned about her image--excuse me, didn't she just play a stripper in Sin City last year and is planning on reprising same role for the sequel this year? And, I don't know anyone who has actually WATCHED her movie Honey that can tell you what it was about... hell, I watched it and don't know what it was about--but she looked really good. She has MADE her image on her body, she should be flattered that Playboy readers are nodding her as their sexiest celeb of 2006.

It will all soon be forgotten.

A Woman's Right to Shoes

I'm 10 minutes deep into one of my favorite Sex and the City episodes: A Woman's Right to Shoes. In this particular segment, Carrie's Manolo's get stolen while at a party for a party in which the crazy hosts required all guests to remove their shoes to prevent germs from coming inside. The jist of Carrie's shoe dilemma is that outside of graduation there is not one occassion that celebrates "you." And, she asks, justifiably: "Hallmark doesn't make a congratulations you didn't marry the wrong guy card... and where's the flatware for going on vacation alone?"

Every single woman, at one time or another, has thought or said the same things.

Carrie ends up getting the hostess to replace the shoes, but not without drastic measures; i.e. I am marrying myself and I'm registered at Manolo Blahnik.

And, I'm thinking, I'd really like to take a jaunt over to my dealer for a fix... I wonder if DSW is having a sale on anything good?

"The fact is, sometimes it's really hard to walk in a single woman's shoes. That's why we need really special ones now and then to make the walk a little more fun."

And that is all there is to it.

Hunger strike is over, bring on the big pond

In the last week, I have purchased, incorrectly, the wrong cat food for the boys. There are lots of green bags and apparently, in my haste, I got it wrong twice. So, the boys have been on a hunger strike. Today, I got the right stuff; and they are content... I'd say happy, but they ARE cats and so therefore, there must be something to be snitty about at all times. Aside from the kibble issue, they have a very large blue water dish which they often lie around--like large jungle kitties do near the river or what-have-you. They don't necessarily drink, but just lie there--and nothine sets Calvin into a worried panic as when you pick up the big pond to refill it. One: it leaves a ring indent in the carpet which must be "fixed." Two: the confusion as to where the big pond has gone and when it will be back looms. It is always, without fail, returned within the minute, but you know, the vaccuum cleaner has never harmed them and still they run from it like it will suck them in alive.

Yeah, it's like that.