Vinnie Doth Protest - Severely

Well, nearly a full week into the feline diet regime, Vinnie came stomping out of the bedroom (the way only a 28 pound cat can) on two separate occassions today, threw himself on the floor and bitched. He was not out of kibble, and on one occassion got his daily treats, which he seemingly boycotted for several minutes in some kind of tantrum I am not familiar with... because I tell you--put a Butterfinger on the table next to me, you'll be lucky if I don't take your fingers off grabbing it. Of course, that could just be early onset PMS.

Diet Cat Food

For the last several weeks, I've been thinking about the vet's advice to put Vinnie on a diet cat food. She, of course, recommended a prescription food. I've been down the Rx food for cats road before... and I'm sure his refusal to eat it would result in lost weight... but it's twice as expensive as any cat food on the market and I'm moving in 26 days... so it may not be entirely practical.

Still, I'm concerned with his weight and refusal to come out from under the bed a large part of the day where I can get him to move around and play. So I did a little online research and decided that I would try Innova cat food. They make a reduced fat version of their food and from what I've read, many people have had success alone with the regular version simply because it is a high protein, low carb food more in tune to a cat's natural diet.... whatever "natural" means--I know I joke my boys are jungle beasts, but I don't see them lasting a day on the Serengeti if they had to get their own bunnies and birds. Ok, MAYBE Calvin would, but that is a big maybe.

Today was the big day. I went to PetSuppliesPlus and picked up a bag of the food at more than twice what their usual kibble costs. But, I was excited. I came home and, as you do when you completely switch cats' food, mixed it with their current kibble. It seems to be a big hit overall and I'm sitting back waiting for a svelte kitty to come traipsing out of the bedroom anytime. Maybe that is a big over-eager, but I for some reason really do expect to see the weight fall off them like someone wrote about in their review... cause if Wikipedia has taught us anything at all, it's that corporate people don't sneak in on the sly and review their own products, right?

Cake, Squats and A Cat's Life

The week started a bit rough... I wasn't feeling good, the rain had no end in sight and a piece of red velvet cake made me so ill on Monday I wanted to throw up, but could not. I have a very strong aversion to vomiting... probably why I will never succumb to bulimia in the traditional sense.

Tuesday's PT session found me working with the trainer after my round with the PT... he had me work on lunges and squats. My thighs hurt so bad today, because I also went running twice yesterday, that I could only manage a third of a mile running today and did the rest speed walking and the trainer told me he wasn't going to torture me with anything else today.

But working from home, while I am more than beginning to loathe it and feel very much like a hermit, has some interesting sides. My cats, for example... in order that they are not lying on my keyboard and traipsing on the table where there just isn't the room for them, they must have a chair right next to mine... and I would say that at most times of the day, it is occupied. Many times, with a paw resting on my thigh. Also interesting is that in the 2.5 weeks I've been home, there have been no instances of Flying Spaghetti Monsters... apparently, they are not inclined to wreak their special brand of havoc on kitties when humans are present.... despite the absence of the FSM, Vinnie is still mindful of the ceiling fan and, I've learned, spends most of the day under the bed.

Tuna, the Tasty Treat

This morning found me at Beaner's struggling to push open a door that was only to be opened by pulling... tis a sad thing the DTs of caffeine. But, I made it in, and then out again with a coffee and bagel, then it was to farmer's market where I purchased some cucumbers, carrots, cabbage and a cookie.... which reminds me, I still have half a cookie I should remove from my bag... but I digress. Upon getting home (after a side trip to Bed, Bath and Annoying Salespeople Beyond) I made myself a huge salad which I topped with cucumbers, tomatoes, almonds and tuna. Since I cannot eat a whole can of tuna and never seem to use the remaining contents before they get yucky, I often give half to me, and half to the cats. Today was no exception.

And, as I sit here picking at what is left of my salad, I am amused to watch the boys roll into the living room, fresh from the feast and clean themselves for a good 30 minutes--as if they plunked into the water, pulled the fish from its very depths, dismantled it fin to gill and had a tasty lunch. In their minds, I guess, they simply did not stroll up to a plate and eat tuna, it probably was the result of the hunt. Now, they are all stretched out like gumby kitties in various positions, purring and obviously clean.

Is it Friday, yet?

It's been a long week... today feels like it should be Friday, but given the amount of work on my plate, it's probably good that it isn't. The good news is that I put together and met the deadline I said I would for the first major milestone in my big project.... in between all the other projects and being pulled in 12 directions. Ah, if only I were gumby some days. Still, for my first week working from home, an amazingly large amount of work has been done, and in an amazing number of hours for it already being Thursday.

Since I was home this week, I did the test run on tranquilizers for the trip to PA... not for me, though that isn't a half bad idea, but rather, kitties. Now that the concern for bad side effects has been alleviated, and I have been slightly amused by the ordeal, I can check it off my list and move on.

This was also to be my last day of physical therapy today... but as I explained to the PT that the pain seemed to have moved from the back side of my hip to the top front side and she checked the area out and well, the pain was more intense than getting inked on the shin bone... and there may still be finger marks in the table I was lying on. In fact, I still hurt somewhat and am due to ice soon. Ice and then bed.., I am determined to get up and go running (or speed walking, depending on pain level) before I start work tomorrow. I did this Monday and it was terrific.... and then the rain. Tomorrow morning, I go rain or shine.

Cool Nip on Hot Dayz

I'm not sure if an 85 degree day constitutes a break in the heat wave, but regardless it seems to be one of the few days that no one is griping about how hot it is... these same people will be bitching come February about how cold it is... but whatever... I love it. Even if it means that the cats have to stay in and the AC is on -- they don't seem to understand that 95 degrees will melt their fur and singe their whiskers and generally lead to my having to clean vomit off the rug, the latter of which causes me to shut the balcony door and leave the air on. But their reward for today, aside from an open door is cat nip fresh from my run on the bike trail. I returned with three stalks and Jake has comandeered all of them; greedily lying on two while chewing on the third--his eyes rolling back in his head. But, Vinnie has emerged from the bedroom, and will put the smack down on Jake to claim what is rightfully his.

What I would really like today, is to turn on the ceiling fans, but I know I will never get Vinnie out from under the bed if I did, and he could have a heart attack. Last weekend, on my trip to Chicago, I left HGTV on for the kitties... upon my return, I found Vinnie sitting on the ottoman watching it. Upon mentioning this to mom, she said HGTV shows are always taking down ceiling fans and he was probably quite enthralled with these wonderful people. I'm not sure about that, but I wanted to leave the TV on for them and HGTV seemed the safest bet.

This morning found me at the Farmer Market. Since my cucumber plants produced only 3-4 cucumbers and died, I bought several--and tomatoes too. Now, I do have about 8 tomato plants in the garden on the verge of producing ripe tomatoes, but who can wait--and are there ever too many tomatoes in the summer? I also picked up two bouquets of sunflowers. They are lovely around the apartment. The cats could seem less interested in them--especially with some greenery of their own now and they make me happy.

I was thinking about my move on the run, from which I am still sweaty and in need of a shower, but I'm not sure I'm done just yet... I might have more run in me still today; I haven't decided... but I digress quickly. I was thinking about gardening next summer in Philly. I saw community gardens there, and it might be a good idea, but I also want to try gardening some on my balcony, and wonder how the boys might respond to large pots of dirt...? Will they be as disinterested in them as they are so much of what I do, or will they see them as convenient litter boxes outside? I guess time will tell.

In the meantime, Jake and Vinnie are about to get into a knock-down, drag-out fight over a stalk of nip... while two remain off to the side, alone, the two of them are both in need of the same piece, and apparently, there is only one quality leaf on the stalk and they both must have it. Perhaps more running is indeed in store.

Mahalo.

Early morning un-welcomed events

Thursday, approximately 3:15 a.m. I am awakened by a sudden rush of cat noise, most particularly Calvin's high pitched growl/meow. Bowie and Vinnie are in the bedroom with me, and as I get up, I hear Jake hissing something fierce... I assume one helluva fight is ensuing. In an unfocused haze of sleep and wake, I stumble out of my bedroom into the hallway to see Calvin crouching and Jake nearby, both are creating havoc at a third feline body that is sitting casually in the middle of the living, looking around. The third cat sees me and takes off out the balcony door from which he came and jumps off. It is the neighbors cat who figured out a way up to our balcony. I closed the door, congratulate Calvin on his fierce guarding of the homestead and stumble back into bed.

Thursday, approximately 6:30-6:45 a.m. My alarm wakes me at 6:30; as is the typical case, I lie in bed a few moments until I hear the coffee pot kick on... this morning, I drifted back to sleep shortly after waking and about 10-15 minutes later, woke again and got up. I stumble into the kitchen, my hair a wavy mess of curls that are 5 times larger than usual. I grab my very LARGE cup and put in the necessary Sweet n' Low and creamer... and turn to the coffee pot to see it mysteriously without coffee. The light is on that it has brewed. My first thought is I did not put water in the reservoir. I check and there is water. Nothing is hot. Panic ensues. I begin pushing buttons like a mad-woman, because, quite frankly, I am at this time of the morning without hope of coffee. It quickly becomes clear, to my utmost horror, that the Mr. Coffee has met its very end.

Now, with regard to that last, very sad occurrence, I ended up with another coffeepot from work... as a result of the office closing, there is no need for the non-leased coffee pot and I was told I could take it. It is very nice, nicer than I would have bought. My unfamiliarity did cause a slight moment of panic when I thought I set the auto brew this morning and there was no coffee again. Turns out, I didn't turn it on even though I had set it. At least there was coffee to be had this morning. The woman in Beaner's yesterday clearly did not understand the level of incoherence I had when I went rushing in. I was so out of it, I ordered a bagel--a food item that I rarely eat and ends up making me sick 9 times out of 10. Yesterday was one of those 9 times...

Flying Spaghetti Monsters and Puppies

Another late evening at work found me coming home to an apartment ransacked by what I can only imagine was the Flying Spaghette Monster (FSM). I've blogged many a time about the FSM and its relentless pursuit of getting my kitties in serious trouble. Tonight, as is par, the cupboards were all open and the food processor dumped onto the floor... the boys and I cleaned up the mess and played for about an hour while I ate dinner and made chili. I then explained to them that I had to leave for a little while and go over to the Aunt SKs to take care of her puppy. The mere mention of puppy perked Vinnie's ears up to a frequency not typically seen unless we are discussing Santy Claus... I explained about Mission and puppies and how they don't use litter boxes--all of which seemed to facsinate Vinnie who simultaneously eyed the ceiling fan. Calvin gave a look from the desk that indicated he had no interest in puppies and their neanderthal ways.

So it was off to SKs... Mission at least did not blow me over into the door in a frenzy of excitement as she did the last time. It is nice that she's excited to see me, but I'm grateful she didn't pin me to the door since I'm still scrapped and bruised from the vet trip on Saturday. I took Mission for something of a drag around the condo property. She obviously was not interested in running much and at one point, tried to kill me by running at a good clip next to me then suddenly stopping right in front of me. It was a sly move. Still we ran a mile before she really insisted that we stop and wanted to go back home. Apparently, she wanted some kibble and then to go back out... so we went out for another 20 minutes and then she was really done.

Upon my arrival home, I was thoroughly investigated and sniffed... and the boys were quite displeased with the horrendous odor I brought back on my hands. Apparently, it was only worsened by Body Shop Daisy-scented soap... however, all is quite easily forgiven with a few hits of nip and a few minutes of playing with an old shoelace.

A little trip to the vet

Saturday I embarked on an experience which I hope to not relive anytime soon. All kitties to the vet for vaccines and general check up before moving... we are talking a combined weight of approximately 85 lbs. Now, I'd say I'm in pretty good shape; my resting heartrate most days is right about 60, I workout regularly, but in the 10 minutes that it took to get the boys downstairs and into the car must have gotten my heartrate up higher than any elliptical, treadmill or running trail I've met in sometime.

Long story made short, as I am standing at the counter to pay for the aforementioned services, with blood dripping from my neck, my toenails torn, a fingernail ripped in half, covered in cat urine, scrapped, scratched, bruised and the thought of having to get them all back in the car and then drive home and get them upstairs rolling in my head, the receptionist looks at me all perky smiles and asks if it was worth it to bring them all in at once. What I wanted to say was: Are you fucking kidding me? But, instead, I handed over my credit card, smiled and said nothing.

I don't know if it was worth it or not, but it is over in one fell swoop. Admittedly, I wouldn't do it again without some help and really, at this point in my life, that means that no, I wouldn't do it again. And now, with Calvin sleeping on the desk (where he's not supposed to be), head propped up by some pencils and snoring like mad it is time to finish dinner and get ready for tomorrow.

Cats and FSM

Tonight, as many nights in the last few weeks, I came home to a mess... cupboards doors all open, stuff fallen off the counter and tables, clothing once on hangers now on the floor, cat food bowls seriously empty. My cats, after much interrogation, maintain innocence... I have come to the very valid conclusion that my cats would never do such "bad" things--they are far too tired for starters and and their non-rest periods are used for grooming (especially in Calvin's case). The only other possible explaination would be the Flying Spaghetti Monster (or the "Flyin' M'segtti Monster" as we refer to him around here because Vinnie seems to like and respond to alliteration).

Yes, the FSM does come by here every third Tuesday of the month and the occasional Wednesday to taunt kitties and get them into trouble... but apparently with the holiday, the FSM is visiting on an altered schedule. Interestingly, when I ask Vinnie if it was the FSM that came in here and ate all his kibble and opened all the cupboard doors, he looks leerily at the ceiling fan. Jake did as well tonight. This startling new fact leads me to believe that the FSM enters via a ceiling fan system... and finally explains why Vinnie is so terrified of the fans, and why Jake seems to suddenly be skeptical.

Well, folks, it was either the cats and FSM or the Newsweek article I read on the Clusterfuck to the Whitehouse... I do love Jon Stewart's title for this upcoming election... and well, while I thought the article was worthwhile and interesting, it required too much thinking on my part tonight.

Next up: Saturday's vet visit... all four boys getting vaccinated and checked out. As the woman at the office said: It will be an adventure. I hope I survive.

Irreverent musings on a summer day

Earlier today, while driving, I had a brilliant diatribe for this space... it always happens when driving--I become absolutely a brilliant composer in my head, and by the time I park, take care of everything and have a few minutes... it is GONE. Well, not the fiction--not usually, just my thoughts on life, because they are oft fleeting and typically not worthy of notation; but I'm fairly certain that I probably had the key to something like the fountain of youth and it is forever lost in the dire need to stop off for vegetables and eggs. And if any of you try to tell me that a healthy diet is the key to that fountain... there might be an accident.

Of one thing I can assure you, cats are not the key to living a youthful existence sometimes. Bowie has spent the last several minutes crying like he's dying... and you know why? He is afraid of his reflection in the mirror. I remove him from the bathroom counter and he's back up there, screaming bloody murder. He is a fierce and mighty jungle beast instill fear into the hearts of those in his path, and that includes him.

To counter Bowie, I turned up the speakers on my iPod... yegods, if the neighbors don't already hate me they now have Bon Jovi at arena level decibels. At least I'm not nekkid... at least, not anymore, earlier on the patio might have been another story... and I wouldn't say nekkid as much as I would say topless... there is a subtle difference.

And now, the crisis of dinner... I have stuff to make, I even found some relatively exciting and new recipes; I did go grocery shopping last night and to farmers market this afternoon... but the crisis is not what to make, but IF to make... Lately, I don't want dinner; I'm hungry, but all I really want is copious amounts of Diet Coke or Diet Mountain Dew. I am willing to fore go food for this all driving want. I know it is bad, I know I should cook something healthy and eat and forget the soda, but I am thinking, I will be in the drive thru getting a soda, or at the 7-11 and not eating dinner again tonight. It makes me worry, one of the memories very strong for me is of my grandma--who rarely ate anything beyond a donut and the rest of her day was spent consuming coffee and cigarettes and a pace I've yet to see paralleled. I don't intend on taking up smoking, but I swear, there are some days I would just not eat and would drink coffee or soda all day so I wouldn't have to bother... that is, of course, if you threw in a few jelly candies or a cookie... I'm not a donut girl.

On that note, today is the kinda day that after sitting out on the patio reading a Shape magazine, one should go and wash one's car--and get a soda.

Mahalo.

Back, Baby!

I'm back from my trip to my mom and dad's for a long weekend. Mom's gardens are in fantastic blooms--my allergies are still also in fantastic bloom--I got a lot of pictures, and this is just one.

There were frogs in the pond this morning, too. Quite cute, just sitting there resting... the chickens (yes, the have chickens, turkeys and bunnies... I will have to share the saga of the bunny farm at another time) were also happy this morning clucking and eating watermelon rind. We got a nice boat ride in on Friday evening. My brother stopped in for a few hours also...

Saturday found us going to garage sales--it was, after all, Father's Day weekend as such, you subject yourself to the insanity of garage sales with my dad. There are rules and guidelines... first, there is ALMOST no point in going unless you get there early and on the FIRST day--otherwise, the "good stuff" will already be gone. Second, you have to drive for 20 minutes and then almost talk yourself out of going once there because of distance, the caliber of stuff that might be for sale, whether or not the sellers are "bums." Finally, and apparently, the last rule I had nearly forgotten, but was reminded of when dad veered into the opposite lane of the highway, turned around in someones yard and then sent me flying from one side of the backseat to the other is that the rules of driving are suspended when searching out garage sales.

Saturday wrapped up with my taking the folks to dinner to celebrate their 20th anniversary. They decided on the new "Greek" restuarant in Cheboygan. Actually, I have to say it was more "Greek fusion" that is, Greek fused with Cheboygan. Moussaka was good, and suspiciously more like eggplant parmesan than any moussaka I've tasted... Gyros from what I could see were served up on a ciabatta bun... the Greek salad description surprisingly did not include feta, rather, "Special Feta Greek Dressing." I had the veal, it was quite tasty, dad had the shish kabobs, which were also quite good. Mom and I veered away from the Spinach pie as it was described as having ricotta, parmesan and mozerella cheeses with Greek spices--it was concerning. Also concerning was that the waitress came to the table and informed us that they were out of baked potato... Er, baked potato? Well, okay... but I was a little surprised by their spicy feta hummus... which might have been good, but we passed. All in all, the food was good, but certainly not what I would really call Greek... perhaps Greek inspired. One bonus on the dining experience was that in the hallway to the dining room were a series of photographs of the building of the Machinaw Bridge. For those not aware, this is the 50th Anniversary of the Bridge... and in acknowledgement of that, Mike Fornes, a local writer and journalist I've admired for many, many years has a book on the Bridge coming out this August. Mr. Fornes was very supportive of me as a writer when in high school, and for that I will always be grateful. I look forward to his latest endeavor.

I did make it to Mackinaw over the weekend as well, and got myself some Oreo Popcorn from the Popcorn Factory... yeah, I know, how do you take a relatively healthy snack like popcorn and turn it into a snack worse than 3 Snickers? Glaze it with sugar and toss in crushed oreos... but it was yummy!

So, busy weekend... but I am back. The kitties have almost forgiven my absence--fresh catnip, lots of treats and even more air conditioning seems to have helped with that effort. And now, a little TV and then a little sleep before the craziness of a Monday sinks in.

Saturday Miscellany

Apparently, the lack of sleep caught up to me last night and nailed me. It seems that my mom called at some point, and while I remember talking to her, I have not a clue about what. All I do remember is that when I got up from the chair to go into my bed somewhere in the area of midnight, Bowie had been stalking and hunting a moth. This is big excitement in the life of a housecat... so you can imagine his utter disappointment that I was not about to have his trophy buried in the blanket next to my head and tossed it to the floor. Yes, it was his blanket, but overall it is my bed.

But I awoke this morning, feeling quite good and appalled that it was only 6 a.m. So I went back to bed, if not to sleep and laid there thinking for about an hour and a half. I've had a really good bout of feeling down this week... and nothing really seems to be helping to pull myself out of this funk. I tried shopping today, but I'm feeling like a balloon right from the Macy's parade. I don't even feel like shoe shopping these days.

I'd love it if the girls all got together and hung out at an outside patio at some bar... just hang out and chat and talk and all that shit like we used to... but so many have moved, or moved on, or I have moved on. I miss it right now. I think since I'm moving some feel like I'm already gone and have just annexed me out--like it is a personal affront to our friendship that I am leaving the area. Someone pointed out to me today that I need to reread Women Who Run With the Wolves and not worry about it... that many of my local friendships currently exist not because I share a lot of common interests, but because they have always been there... and I will find my "urban tribe" when I seek out and away where it will be easier because I will have no other options.

In the meantime, I really want a pedicure, so I think I will treat myself and go out for one. It will go nice with the tattoo appointment I have for Tuesday--if I am going to be drawing attention to my feet with an ankle band tat, best that they don't look like I've spent hours in the garden over the last few days!

Ambiguities, Anteaters and other things that are not related to the letter A

Part one: Ambiguities

To say astrology is, at best, ambigious seems to be rather redundant. But allow me to paint a picture: I get home from work, clean up a hairball, put my iPod on the charger, put my lunch stuff away, go into the bathroom, clean up another hairball and sit down to read my horoscope for the day, because apparently, it is only delivered via email after most of my day has past... to which it reads thusly...

Well, what was that? Frankly, you can't believe your eyes or your ears. But
after the initial shock wears off, you'll just have to laugh. Everyone has their
own way of dealing with things, and this definitely isn't yours!

I believe, wholeheartedly that this is a very circular horoscope and making any sense of it is really not possible. What I do find striking is that at least it matches in recieving it at the latter part of the day.

Part two: Anteaters

Today it was suggested to me that to allievate the ant problem I have in my garden, I should obtain and utilize an anteater. Shortly after this suggestion, SK was called in to perform some G2 gathering on this seemingly realistic approach to organic gardening.... and after dashing the hopes of this plan working, suggested several other alternatives... non nearly as exciting, but several on par with feeding a pigeon an alka seltzer. My mother, however, being rational and such merely suggested hiesting an anteater from the zoo... which obviously makes more sense than saving coffee grounds. Additional G2 may be required.

Part three: other things that are not related to the letter A

Officially, my time for the 5k yesterday was 40:17. Now, I have something to beat for the next time. Competitive? I know I will never be the one coming in with a time of 15 minutes or less, but if I could get to around 34 eventually, I think that would be sweet.

And in one of those things that make you stop and go... hmmm...Reuters reports today on how "mooing" ringtones, among other sounds, like sheep, etc. are being used to lure leopards that have infiltrated Indian villiages in the state of Gujarat. If nothing else, check out the article for the super awesome picture of a leopard playing on a tire swing.

That's it. I'm out.

Yesterday was the last long training walk... the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer is now just days away. I admit, I'm excited... looking for tent decorations for the Wellness Villiage, getting the last minute supplies, getting my sleeping bag laundered and ready... tonight, I will do a dry run on the gear bag to make sure it doesn't exceed the 30 pound limit and that the bag itself is large enough.

This week for me will focus more on giving my body some rest; shorter walks, strength training and time permiting, playing in my new garden... I also need to get the cats situated and all necessary supplies at hand for SK and Mal--despite SKs threat of refusing the boys treats, I think she will acquiese once a purring sweet faced Calvin or Jakey rub against her.

Despite my excitement about the impending Walk and vacation, I realize all too much that there is just not a lot of time to get all the things that I want done... and if the places I needed to go were open right now, I'd be there instead of here, writing about it. And really, yesterday might have provided more opportunity to get all these things done, except yes, I sat on my patio for 2 hours reading and soaking in too much sun after my training walk.

Vacation is a much needed escape and the first part will find me doing the Walk and visiting friends I have not seen--some for years! And then concluding with hiking in the Catskills and a stop by Niagara Falls on the way home via my Canadian neighbors--providing the US Government will cooperate and get my passport here as they indicated the would several months ago. Don't make me sense a conspiracy!

The time now is upon me to get dressed, get som hula hooping in and get going on some gardening supplies... there is an orientation today, and hopefully a little time for me to work the land--as is said... indeed a full day of excitement ahead.

Trifecta Realized

Last night, SK and Mal were over for dinner and to arrange for cat care while I'm on vacation. I decided I should try the concept arrived at one dreary, rainy day at the office--coco crispies treats with peanut butter... and they were awesome!! The trifecta was complete--chocolate, peanut butter and marshmallows.

World domination is only moments away!

Airport Entertainment and Getting Home

Well, I made it back from my travels Friday night--very late. But you know the nice thing that NorthWest does for you when they have delayed your flight is entertain you. Yes, the same folks that brought you the mechanics strike, among others, can't seem to get their plane fixed, so they play musical gates. Gate 2 at Reagan National was originally what we were to depart from... and after moving to Gate 5 via the board, we get to Gate 5 only to have the attendant there yell at us that even though the Board said it was our gate we needed to be at 2... meanwhile, over at Gate 2, the attendant is making an overhead announcement that our flight will be departing from Gate 5... now these gates are not more than 50 feet from each other, so the attendants begin to yell across the terminal at each other. Within 1o minutes, we were back at Gate 2... then 5 before we FINALLY departed over an hour later, from gate 3. I feel bad, we never utilized Gate 4. So the flight is delayed though no fault of anyone holding a boarding pass, we've been shuffled from gate to gate for over an hour and the attendant, who decided at some point it made more sense to shout from the door rather than use the speaker, began to tell us that we needed to HURRY UP and board... and that the plane, while still containing enough seat-age, was not as large as the scheduled plane, so if someone is in your seat, take another open one, if your seat no longer exists, just sit someplace and do it QUICKLY. The tone obviously implying this was all our fault.

But here's the thing... once they annouced the Southwest type seating, about 10-15 people within hearing distance shoved forward... I was nearly crushed!! So once on the plane, it became ever apparent that the attendant out in the terminal had not communicated her strategy for boarding and seating with the attendants on the INSIDE of the plane... who wanted all those with no seats (rows 23-26) to just stand in the back of the plane while everyone else boarded. I being in one of those rows, just sat down, as did 2 others and we filled up our row, much to the attendant's dismay... so she ran to the front of the plane in the midst of the meyhem to tell us all how SHE wanted this situation handled. A few seconds later, the original instruction giver appeared and yelled at those standing in the back to just sit somewhere... all in all, very entertaining.

Meanwhile, I'm trying to figure out who the hell the guy in the terminal standing next to me was and chatting me up like he knew me was... I became convinced that I must have gone out with him once or twice... that was until take off... and it became clear that he was my former Master's advisor with whom I couldn't ever get a response or agreement from... And, I would have gone back up after the seatbelt sign had been turned off except I would have had to crawl over the Phelgm Phactory that was sitting next to me and apparently was unaware of the advent of Kleenex. He was lucky I didn't have nail clippers and a file on me--I'd have had to kill him.

Fortunately, my bags were not searched at Reagan... and I only had a 90 year old woman in front of me--FOLDING everything she put into the bin. Yes, she got it all nicely into the bin, and then went through the whole body gloucoma test and magnets, but failed to actually put her bins on the conveyor... It was still early, I had no idea of the delay ahead of me... I was nice and shoved them through while the guy with X-ray vision glared at me suspiciously.

And I made it home without a homocide under my garter. The cats were not amused. They were out of kibble and had destroyed the bag of treats... gutted it like it was a gazelle on the Sahara. I think they wanted me to think that SK had done the damage while she was over on Thursday checking on them... but had she done the said deed, BOTH sides of the bag would not have been torn apart; thereby clearly giving them away.

But the weather has been good and the kitties, while not quite forgiving my absence have had almost 24-hour access to the balcony--even if it was too hot out there today (obviously my fault). Yesterday, I did a 21 mile training walk with a fellow walker who was in town for the weekend. It was good, we finished in 6.5 hours... and I learned a few adjustments will need to be made--I'm not happy about learning this so late in the game, but at least I didn't realize it on the walk.

Speaking of the walk... my 522 mile challenge to train that many miles by May 1 was met on April 18... as of today, I have trained 571 miles. It feels good, even if today was the first day I was sore... like I said, a few adjustments to the new gear are needed!

This Cat's Life

Vinnie looked at me, his eyes big, ears sharp… as if he couldn’t believe I knew his very secret daytime life. And how could I? I was not here during the day.

Late at night, when I can’t sleep for all the lines crossing in my head from the day and previous week passed and those coming up, I make stories up to Vinnie-kitty, who seems attentive enough an audience. His responses are always adequately appropriate… there was the whole Santa Claus fiasco—who knew cats were terrified of Santy Claus. Of course, he’s like a cat burglar in his tactics, so in retrospect, it makes good sense that cats are leery of the big guy. Then, there was the Flying Spaghetti Monster, with whom it turns out cats have a symbiotic love-hate relationship with. Of course, it is not well documented, like most evolutionary theories. Most recently, there was a terrible scare involving the Evil Bunnies that come by each year on the first Sunday following the First Full Moon after the equinox (catholic holiday my ass). Turns out these Evil Bunnies come by and completely terrify all kitties for no good reason… leaving behind eggies of various form and composition. Simply disgusting by all feline account.

But, on this rather chilly, insomniatic evening in May, I uncovered a scathing secret of cat life—they are daytime superheros. It all makes sense, the exhaustion and ravenous appetites they suffer in the evening hours. Mistakenly, I, and others, assumed that cats did nothing but sleep and move about their mousy and SpongeBob toys during the afternoon… but sadly that is only a mere diversion from the real inconvenience they are tagged with—saving the world. It also explains perfectly well why it is I never once caught a glimpse of Mina on Life of Dave’s webcam while they were in Paris.

Now, it is obvious, like most 9 to 5ers, cats take the usual weekend hours off… there are apparent exceptions, like most situations… but for the most part, it seems, this cat’s life is only burdened and inconvenienced with saving the world during work hours. Perhaps dogs cover the non-working hours of cats, which would account for the serious state of affairs these days. As Jake would say, if cats could in fact speak English—it is all simply disgusting… and in much need of being buried, no doubt.

Big Cat Diaries

Delighted that there was something on tonight that didn't involve baseball or Law and Order SVU (sometimes, I just can't handle episodes about child killers and child slavery)... I excitedly turned over to Animal Planet for Big Cat Diaries... relieved that there wasn't something on like Animal Cops... I said, "Calvin, Big Cat Diaries" and he hopped out of his condo bed and onto the chair next to me and Jake. However, Calvin, who I have witnessed actually watch the show, and mimic the cheetahs, seems to only be interested in sleep. He purrs a little and looks at me sleepily as I say, look at the kitties on TV! He is clearly not interested in being a Cheetah or my entertainment tonight. And neither is Jake, who just strolled off, no doubt to drink out of the toliet.

Ever changing forecasts

This morning and into early afternoon, the weather loomed dreary and cold... nothing above 40 all week. By this evening, the weather is now forecast for the end of this week warmer, near 60. It will change again, but it is always peculiar watching things change so drastically in such a short amount of time... much like life generally. Sometimes it seems as if things move so quickly there just isn't the time to notice them... and one day we stop and say how in hell did I get here? And sometimes, we rush through things to enjoy what comes at the end--like to night, I ate my last two strawberries much faster than I really wanted, but there was some cool whip in the bowl, and I wanted to give it to Jakey... the enjoyment watching him have a cool whip treat was worth the forced strawberry consumption. Kitties with cool whip on their whiskers and smiles on their faces sometimes are better than a stomach ache for a few minutes.

On becoming a hula champ and other Friday endeavors

By this morning, I was up to a full minute on the hula hoop, and by this evening, the skills are coming fast... I'm up to about 2 minutes. I love the challenge of it.

The cats are less afriad of it now, having managed to turn it into some kind of spotlight by which to be admired. All except Vinnie, who eyes it with suspicion, but not as much suspicion he reserves for the ceiling fans. And Bowie, who, as it was falling from my last hula round swiped it with his paw, and pulled it into the papazan chair so he could lick and bite it.

I've had an idea in my head for a painting for about 3 weeks, so I took the time today to put it to canvas... or at least start to. It is far more formal of an abstract than I've done in the past and therefore took some thinking, sketching and a lot of thought about whether I still could color in the lines. And, I'm very happy with how it has come along so far. There is a poem in that painting when it is done... I can feel it, and for me, that it a good sign.

Took some mental health time today, and it has made a world of difference. It has felt good to be at home by 4 rather than just getting home right about NOW... I got in a decent workout--nothing extreme or lengthy, just about 45 minutes... did some grocery shopping... ran an errand and came home to make dinner. An actual dinner, cooked in the oven... tomorrow will be cleaning and a much bigger workout before my brother arrives. I'm excited to see and spend some time with him this weekend.

Dwelling in the past

After an incredible workout tonight, and an incredible experience in buying new cross trainers, I returned home to find some state of disarray. It seems that the jungle kitties were extraordinarly bored today. A chair toppled over, the veggie basket on the counter overturned, the lotion and some jewelry from the bedroom table scatter about the floor, cabinets open everywhere... and as I walked though the place, putting things in order, I was lecturing Jake who was following me around, desperate for to be petted. When I got into the bathroom to put close the cupboard, I stopped to pet him and he just gave me this look as I continued talking about all the badness that occurred. The look said: Lady, that has already happened, quit dwelling on it and pet me, fur is itchy.

Of course, I realize the futility in telling the cats that they were bad for things done in the past; it was over and they survived, there was no harm done--and no sense in even remembering it past the thrill of the flying tomatoes or the bejesus being scared out of them as the chair fell. And I I could just move on, sit down and pay them the devotion they so deserve... I would obviously have much happier cats.

Busy weekend

It has been all kinds of crazy-hectic... saturday was an all day crop to raise money for the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer.... Scrapbook Memories in Chelsea is awesome and donated the space and crop fees raising $500 for the Walk. They are also holding a raffle for a great prize for another month if anyone is interested... proceeds for that will also go to benefit the Avon Foundation and breast cancer. There was a lot of prepping for the event--but in the end, it was worth it. Several women came up and told me their stories about survival, family loss; there were several emotional hours.

Today, was a beautiful day after the brief thunderstorms, and Jake was able to come and go from the balcony to the apartment at his leisure. He sleeps now, a happy kitty. The sunshine was good for all of us. I finally made the decision/leap to fill the application to belong to the community garden program. Come May I will be gardening my little half plot of land and volunteering with the community gardening group. Obviously, I will need a straw hat.

I also managed to hit the rec center today... got in a great workout and then went grocery shopping. I remember when I was a kid, Friday was the day everyone went grocery shopping, as such, I've ignored Friday's in the grocery for forever... but it dawned on me this afternoon that Sunday afternoon really is the bad day for shopping. And it only took me months of Sunday afternoons of standing on line in Kroger to figure it out.

And now, it is time to shut down the laptop for the evening and start winding down toward another Monday.

The Sunday Sermon

Not so much a sermon as I haven't had much time since Wednesday... mom came in for the weekend on Thursday afternoon and just left a few hours ago.

Thursday evening, we went to see Bob Seger at Cobo in Detroit. It was a Code Red on the mullet alert; and I have to say, I never thought I would bear witness to such a thing, but there was a grey-hair man (okay, there were LOTS of grey-haired men) with not only a mullet, but somehow combined in a combover. The show itself was good... Seger is a great performer... Uncle Kracker opened for him, Kid Rock made an appearance to do the song they recently recorded together, but for a guy who can rock, he is the epitome of hard core white rockers--rythymless off a musical instrument. I swear, he did a lot of double Sprinklers and generally white man dancing--and not even to the beat of his own music. Thank god he came into his 40 years ago, he'd never survive now if he had to break into the scene. Still, I couldn't help but laughing between bouts of being horrified.

Last night, mom and I went to see Music & Lyrics... I can't remember laughing so hard. Hugh Grant is priceless and nails the 80s hairband has been. The "video" of him with his 80s band at the beginning is well worth the price of admission. It's Wham! meets Flock of Seagulls... and even Grant can't seem to make it through without laughing at the ridiculousness of it. It's a fluffy romantic comedy that you totally expect from Hugh Grant and Drew Barrymore, and quite light on the romantic, too, but it's there. The plot, eh, who needs one with one-liners like "I'll show you the roof; it's upstairs" and "That Debbie Gibson can sure take a punch" who needs a plot. Besides, Hugh Grant gets his now infamous hip thrust "dance" in at every chance--and if you can't enjoy a middle-aged Brit doing his best Elvis, then up your medication.

And the cats have also survived a weekend of company... just barely. Seems grandma is not to be trusted and must be watched, hidden from and otherwise all the ills of the mistreatment they receive here communicated at every chance. They are now all sprawled out over the living room, sleeping and recovering from I'm not sure what... having to inspect bags, I suppose. Well, I did vaccuum, and that always requires that they take a nap... it's exhausting for them, you know.

As for me, I'm going to finish getting the rest of my laundry together so when I return from the gym and grocery shopping, I can get that done and outta the way for another week. Otherwise, that's all I got for now.

Fever

Yesterday as I was leaving work, it hit me immediately--the scent of spring on the air. It was late when I got home, but it was also very apparent that the kitties were keenly aware of this as well and desperately wanted to get outside on the balcony to further investigate their suspicions. This morning at 5:45 a.m. they decided that it was also time that they needed to do some additional detective work on the balcony. When I did not move as quickly as anticipated, Bowie made a figure eight pacing pattern over my bladder and Calvin decided that his best course of action was to make a new bed of Kleenex on the floor. Almost needless to say, I was up by 6.

Jake has pretty much decided that if possible, he is staying out on the balcony today... Calvin, too, with intermitten checks on the happenings inside. Bowie and Vinnie concluded their assessment that it does in fact smell like spring and the excitement has rendered them asleep. Afterall, it is wet out there, and the other two may decide that they will tolerate that, but they are finding it rather disgusting, yet better than that cold, white frozen shit that plagued them in the last week. Now if I would only come to my senses and just leave the door open for them to come and go as they so please.

But, the cats are not the only ones excited about the warmer temps and the distinct scent that life is coming back to green... my perpetually chilled body and numb fingers are estatic. Besides, I love walking outside, and it is finally getting back to that point. It is energizing to me, and I want to go shopping!! Want to shed the winter ware in lieu of some springy dress that I know is still a bit too cold for yet, but optimism runs through me. Much like the enduring optimism Jake holds that if he presses enough on the patio door, it will somehow magically open for him... it has never worked, but he never stops trying it. And for those of you thinking, that is what makes humans smarter or superior, keep in mind I see humans do virtually the same thing all the time.